Wednesday, 10 December 2008

Elf'n'Safety

The concern about industrial and agricultural injuries among the workforce has been fed by some catastrophic accidents recently. Agricultural accidents have a tendency to catastrophe as the machinery and tools are designed to concentrate the use of force. As a result anyone employing labour, casual or otherwise, must now complete a full week's course on safety at work. The courses are being run by the Coldiretti.

I had them all insured, but the prospect of teaching my grandmother to suck eggs - be careful with your chainsaws now, and mind the tractor, and the logging chains. And imagine the specialist vocabulary.

I hope there isn't an exam. I can't face another exam., for the rest of my life. They don't let you take in a dictionary, not even in the German.

7 comments:

Nick Drew said...

i felt that way about exams after graduating - no law or accountancy for me

but then I had to take some really interesting Army exams, which changed my view on the whole exams thing

then the SFA (as was) exams (multiple-choice) ... if you wanna keep learning, it never stops

if only Gordon Brown had done those ones too (and the regulators, for that matter)

(WV = consili, sounds very Italian)

hatfield girl said...

The Army exams have always sounded very hard, what little is known generally about them. All that map reading and gun firing and maths. How did Prince Harry do it? Are there special means for dinning things into heads? And if so, shouldn't all the soldiers be re-directed into secondary schools - they were quite war zonish even when the small HGs were passing through.

The maps of Russia here have figures and calculations written in in Mr HG's father's hand but I can't work out what they refer to.

Do you get taught the history of battles and tactics and things too?

Nick Drew said...

yes, battles, tactics, doctrine, plus all manner of practical things, of course ... not much on strategy, unfortunately, because the Brits have tended to leave that to individual commanders' native brilliance rather than teach it

there has traditionally been a bit of a waiver for the thickos (Foggy Phillips comes to mind) so long as they don't have any pretensions towards being a General (which they don't anyway). I am not so sure Harry is thick, relative to being a junior officer: anyone who qualifies to fly a helicopter has a lot of native something-or-other, it's very difficult indeed

otherwise, dinning is by rote (of course), and for the practical things by actual practice, which always helps (some of these things need to be 'remembered' in the most trying of circumstances - the best exams of all)

Army written exams (of the non-pedestrian kind) are fun because the British is the least intellectual of armies - though full of bright chaps - so the questions are always plain-vanilla. This gives one a strong sense of confidence at the outset. Then one is free to embellish and burnish ones answers with whatever extra value one feels able to offer.

Extra marks can be had for this, because the assessors are generally the brightest-and-best

it is a matter of wonderment in the really intellectual armies (Israeli, Russian, American, German) how the Brits do so well when push comes to shove. It's sort of muddling through, but with something steelier under the casual exterior

little-known fact: the Iraqi army of 1979-89 (war against Iran) made some genuine tactical and even strategic innovations. I never found out who was the genius behind this, but I think we can rule out Saddam ...

WV = logisi - where do you get these apt words, HG ?

Anonymous said...

After my St. Andrews finals, ever so many years ago, I swore a swear that I would never take another exam for the rest of my life. After all, I'd had exams at the end of every single term since the age of eight.

My resolve lasted until January this year, when force of recession (thanks again, Gordon!) made me realise that some certified transferable skills might actually be required before long.

Is there much call for Italian-speaking MCSE's these days?

hatfield girl said...

Wouldn't the actual work be in English, Anon. The Italian-speaking would be needed for everyday life rather than professional use. Still don't know the answer though. Give it a try, make for an utterly beautiful northern Italian city and see what you find.

hatfield girl said...

ND, thank you for the note on army instruction and exams. It's embedding itself into some remarks on teaching and learning. I hope that's all right?

Nick Drew said...

why yes: honoured

where / when shall we see these remarks ?

(WV has dunnit again - polikyli)